Its all about the 'potato basket'!

Well, if you are in a metro and have cash to burn and are above twenty years of age, you must be going to Pubs frequently. Replace the 'and' condition by an 'or' if its applicable to you. Anyway, I'm one who prefers fine dining to the high spirits anyday, but my friends think otherwise. And the good friend that I am, I am often bound to accompany them on their nightly odysseys to mojos or pecos or mojos or pecos or mojos or pecos or mojos or mojos... the list goes on and on, you would think bangalore was strapped for pubs.

So this time, I finally convinced them to go a new place and we settled on LoR or Legends of Rock for the uninitiated. Personally, I like LoR better for its mango-bience (pronounce the mango in hindi, if you used to pronounce it as me-bience (replace me by am) then you have been wrong all your life.)

I order a peach schnapps just for the sake of drinking something. Now if you think thats a gurlie drink, I can't change your mind because India is a free country and you have the freedom of thought. There was a live band playing that night, I forget the name of the band, but the vocalist was pretty good. We order some dragon chicken and paneer tikka along with some drinks.

Ten minutes later,
I say: I say, let's order the potato basket.
Macee: Are you drinking some more?
I say: Nah...I have to go back home.
Macee: Then no need.

Five minutes later,
I say: Let's order the potato basket.
Macee: Are you drinking some more?
I say: Nah...
Macee: Then no need

Two minutes later,
I say: Umm, shall we order the potato basket?
Modi: How much you want to eat man, if you are ordering another 60 then...
I say: Nah...
All three in unison (shouting): Then no NEED, go home and eat dinner.
Ok ok guys, I get the point, no need to be so repetitive.

Modee: Waiter, bill!

Waiter appears with the bill.
We all calculate our share of the drinks. We add it all up and the bill is only Rs. 24 more! We examine the bill closely and realise that the waiter forgot to charge us for the food! We were out the place in the wink of an eye, although it takes a little bit more time to wink when you are drunk. The waiter must have looked at the bill and the cash on the table and gone: aha, i got a fifteen buck tip! That's enough for a masala dosa and coffee in SLV (a fast food restaurant known for its dosas and coffee)! Wait till he realises he has to pay two fifty bucks to pay for our food from his own pocket. We dash out of the parking lot with tinted windows of our car all rolled up.

Once we are out of danger from any any hand thrown projectiles from the waiter,
I say triumphantly: you guys, we should have had the potato basket, we would not have got charged
with an I-told-you-so glint in my eye.

So you agree with me that LoR is better than mojos or pecos?

Pool and Prejudice

It was a lesson to be learnt - that you must not be prejudiced against anything, even if your initial opinion towards any subject or action is negative, which itself may be due to various reasons.

In my case, there was no apparent reason for me to dislike pool other than the fact that pool parlours are generally dark and musty and have a pubbish atmosphere. Maybe that was the dominant reason. It caused me to reject pool as a dirty game and made me come up with false excuses to not play the game.

It's so similar to carrom, only you play it with a stick. So why do you have to pay and play? You may as well play carrom at home for free instead.

How naive of me to make such a comment. There is simply so much more that you can do in pool. Carrom doesn't even come close. However, this naivete prevented me from playing for nearly five years while my friends were enjoying the game thoroughly.

The reason I finally started playing can be regarded as an extremely silly reason. When I got placed at Nvidia, I asked the HR what sort of entertainment was available in the office. I was expecting TT tables, tennis courts et al. But all I got was pool tables for an answer. I was appalled! However, I resolved that if I had to make maximum use of the facilities available, I had to learn to play pool. And so it started. I slowly discovered the game. Initially, its a little tough to learn, but once I got the hang of it, there was no looking back. Nowadays , I'm playing pool almost daily given that its vacation time.

And it was a good lesson learnt. Never underestimate the value of anything or form an opinion on something without trying it out first. You must burn your hands in the fire, even if it is painful sometimes.

Phantom of Manhattan - Book Review

Now, thats what I call a love story. All KANK and K3G lovers out there, read this book by Frederick Forsyth to learn how to write a real love story. Ten on ten for bringing out the senti and emotions. This is sequel to Gaston Leroux's original Phantom of the Opera. Haven't read the original myself, but will surely do so if I find it.

Salsa, its hot baby!

Joined Salsa classes last weekend along with a friend (sorry folks, just a guy friend). And would you believe it, the day we sign up, there are five guys including us and only ONE ,yes you read that right one girl. Imagine my consternation. I must be doomed for life.
Luckily, on the second day, there was a girl from the intermediate class who was lazing around before her class, and the instructor asked her to grace the occasion with her presence and come dance with me. So finally, I got some decent action.

Hurrah, the curse of the Black Pearl is finally broken!

Stan man!

AK about Jammy (referring to his name): Girls will look at him and go Choo Chweet!!!

AK, you are truly the man, The Man from Stan!

A Phone call from a Secret Admirer (yeah, you wish!)

This happened about three weeks ago on the penultimate week of my B. Tech programme in the hallowed NITK engineering institute...

I was sitting on the front steps of the fifth block hostel (also known proudly as the final block) sipping on the packet flavour milk that claimed to be elaichi flavour. As usual, I had to bite on the tip of the plastic cover unsuccessfully for five minutes to get it opened. The stray dog sitting on the porch must have been staring at me lazily and smiling sarcastically inwards -'Oh the inefficiency of these humans! And to think he'll have a B. Tech degree in a fortnight!'

Anyway, I finally dropped the straw in and took a sip. Was all the effort opening it worth it I wondered as the milk touched my tongue and went down the throat. Arghh! Anyway I'm paying for the mess bill, might as well drink it (we are shettys you know, now is that spelled shetties for plural I wonder). Then my MotoSLVR rings. An unlnown caller. 'Hello?'

On the other end: Who is this! ( a sweet female voice!)
To self: Aha! A female, hope not a salesperson.
To the female: You called me, please identify yourself first.

UFC (unknown Female Caller): No! You tell me who you are first.
To self: talk about indecency, anyway, since its only a harmless sweet sounding (maybe beautiful female...
Me: okayyy, this is Vijay. How may i help you? ( I'm always the purrfect gentleman you see).

UFC: You better stop harassing my cousin Priyanka. I know you have been calling her up and troubling her consistently. Even her parents know about this now. if this continues, we will be forced to lodge a complaint with the police!
To self: ???????
Me: I'm sorry, you must have got the wrong person. I don't know any Priyanka. Please check the number you dialled.

UBF (at this point I must rename her Unknown Belting Female to better represent her role): Yeah right. no point trying to covering up. i know who you are, you are Suresh right. I know all about you!
To self: Is this girl gone off the rocker? I told her barely two minutes ago that my name was Vijay. Lemme try again. Maybe she suffers from short term memory loss like the antagonist of the film 'Memento' by Christopher Nolan (if you haven't watched it yet, please do.)
Me: Sorry, my name is Vijay. I'm telling you that you have the wrong numb...

UBF: Yeah right, don't think you can put on a fake identity!
To self: What the !@#$ ! What's wrong with this not so sweet anymore female?
Me: I repeat, you have got the wrong person. Please check the person you have dialled.
UBF: Don't tell me what to do....

Click. At this point I cut off the phone, mildly offended that this female besmirches my reputation and amused that she could actually say I was using a fake identity. Then I got thinking, maybe I have an alter ego, the darker side who calls himself Suresh and goes around harassing females for time-pass. If Edward Norton could have one in 'Fight Club' by David Fincher (If you haven't watched this one yet, You haven't lived at all!). But I quickly dismiss the notion thinking, if I did have an alter ego, he surely would go by a more suede and stylish name, not a Suresh (ughh!) and he would be more darker, not a useless girl-harasser. Maybe a con artist or something like Danny in Hustle ( again watch this BBC series please). Thus satisfied, I walk back into the block.

Ten minutes later, I'm back in my room thinking I can't have her have the last word in that demeaning conversation. i pick up my phone and start typing, 'You better apologise to me or ill be forced to lodge a complaint against you with the police.' And i lay down on my bed waiting for a reply.

Bbeep. Ah a message from who else but the UBF- 'im extremely sorry. i dialled the rong no by mistake. me was in a lot of tension. dialled urs instead of 3455. soo sorry.' There, thats better.

I type back -' Apology accepted. in the future, be more careful. hope suresh stops harassing ur cousin. i do appreciate your standing up to ur cousin though.'
(Always the gentleman, and who can resist a small chance to flirt.)

Reply back - 'she not ma cousin. jus ma friend. she was very anxious, so i decided to help her.'
I type - 'wow! that was a nice tactic covering ur back in case he tried to trace u back! and probably the thing abt her parents knowing was also crap.' (Trust me, she'll be flirting with me now.)
Reply back - 'sorry, culdn follow wat u said'

To self: Oh, another of those good looking dumbo bimbo.
I type - 'i meant u saying u were her cousin and all instead of revealing ur true identity.'
Reply back - ' Oh that! Yeah, thanks. '

And thats all folks. I live on gallantly and with an unblemished record.

I did mention this episode to my friend the lizardking half an hour later in his room. I could see his eyes sparkling with mischief as he said, 'As an apology, you should have asked her to have #$% with you.' Yeah right, if things in the real world were that easy...

Anyway, that evening I was feeling quite bored and suffering from a headache until this episode lightened me up. Thank you, UBF!

Note to self

Not that you are jobless at home and whiling away your time, start posting more!